Time to declare your independence
This is our new fridge. It has ROCKED OUR WORLD.
You're probably already thinking "Kirsten, you've lost it. The world's gone mad, this is supposed to be about declarations of independence/freedom and you're talking about your smudgy fridge!?" Yep. Bear with me and Fridge here ;-) We've had a "perfectly good" fridge for the last many, many years. It wasn't ideal, but it worked. Or at least, we thought it did. There were little "signs" that maybe it wasn't so good for us... all the food that was being thrown out, all the things we couldn't find because we couldn't see them, bending over or doing squats every time we opened it up (the only way we could kind of see or reach anything), the subtle way moods would change when we engaged with it. No big deal though, right? On paper, it was a nice fridge. It wasn't doing anything "wrong". This fridge would be perfectly "acceptable" by most standards. No big deal. No need to change anything. See where I'm going with this? ;-) Might this remind you of some bigger, more relevant things in this world today? Bear with me a little more if not... Then, Covid appeared and we started spending more time interacting with this thing. What had seemed like a small hinderance suddenly showed us its bigger truth, and so I finally ordered a new fridge. And yet, even then, I was willing to justify why making that change wasn't really necessary. I had every intention of canceling delivery on it... had convinced myself that there was no "real" reason to replace ours, we could "deal". I can tell you that the only reason the new Fridge joined our world was because I was too busy to remember to cancel it. On the day Fridge arrived, our world changed. My daughter loves Fridge so much she shows it to everyone she can over FaceTime. She hugs it. She can't wait to have a reason to open it up. The kids discovered they can put magnets on the front now, and display their work with pride. They love it so much, they helped me organize it. I now feel joy rather than a flash of anger every time I open it... I want to hug it too. Restriction is gone, I feel expansion every time I open the doors, I can't wait to see what's inside... It's wonderful. Gone is the massive block I used to have preparing a meal. Gone is the stomachache I'd get throwing food out. Gone is my kids "MOM! I can't find ____!!!" and "What can I eat!?"). Gone is this massive restrictive being that used to live with us, that I didn't even realize was there. It's mind boggling to me that such a seemingly small thing is making such a massively big difference to the flow and joy of our kitchen and our home and even, dare I say, our relationships? Freedom is a tricky and interesting thing. One of our gifts as human beings is our ability to adapt to the "un-freedoms" in our lives. And it's a necessary and important quality that helps us thru struggle and the tough times. We "adapt" to what's around us, and when we are aware of this, it's usually a good thing when combined with hope and vision for a different future. Even in those times of "un-freedom" we have a choice to work with our minds and spirits to free ourselves while we wait for the rest to catch up (Mandela being one of the ultimate examples of this). Other times, like our old fridge, we are so willing and able to "adapt" that we don't even see what's not working for us, what's holding us back, what we are unintentionally agreeing to... Yes, this was just a fridge... and WOW, if just a fridge can make this kind of difference,
Thank you, Fridge, for inspiring this weekend's invitation. Here's what we're gonna do :-) Step 1: Take a moment to reflect and recognize what you want independence from. Trust whatever comes to mind first and then, continue to explore thru these questions: What's holding you back from:
Your ability to CreateForward into your life?
Your most fit and well self?
Your ability to navigate uncertainty?
Your ability to show up to the transformation you want to see for yourself, your loved ones and/or in the world?
Think big, and think small here. Fridge is reminding us that small things DO make a massive difference. And remember, that our goal here isn't to focus or put a lot of energy on what holds us back, it's simply to identify it, set a boundary and free ourselves of it. I also encourage you to dig a little deeper on whatever comes up. For example, is it really a mask, or a person, or an institution or a fridge ;-) you want freedom from? Or is it what they represent, what they create in your life? Free yourself from the bigger thing, not the symbol of it. Free yourself from a mindset when you can't quite yet free yourself from the "thing". Does that make sense? Step 2: Write your own declaration of independence. Read The Declaration of Independence, it's got a lot of inspiration in it. Notice how it does such a beautiful job of inspiring the future while setting the boundary and relinquishing the chains of the past. https://www.archives.gov/founding-docs/declaration-transcript. As you create your declaration, make it fully yours by capitalizing the title, for example, "Kirsten's Declaration of Independence". Write it. Draw it. Collage it. On a scrap of paper, in your journal, on posterboard to hang on your wall. Whatever you want, however you want. You are setting a crystal clear boundary here on what you will and will not tolerate in your life, for your life, around your life any longer. This will change your life, in big and small ways. Step 3: Take some action. Everything you've done so far is pretty powerful inspiration and action. Now it's time to take some action out in the world to create this for yourself. Identify 1-2 first steps that you will take within the next week for each element you are declaring independence from. They can be big or small. What matters is that you choose something you can and will do now, to not just declare your independence, but to move into it.
With BIG Love and Creativity, Kirsten
We are always looking to create conversations and explore together, so PLEASE ;-) be sure to share your experiences with us via Facebook or Instagram. Tell us what’s working for you, what’s not. What aha’s come up. Let’s explore this together and all listen and learn from each other.